Nowadays, we have access to everything, all the time.
We know what is going on, from right here in our street, to what is happening at the other side of the world.
We can order everything right now, and from our sofa back home.
We can follow a million people online, whether we like them or not.
We can see pictures of people’s lives, whether we know them or not.
The input of information, of gossip, of events, of drama, … is endless.
And then we wonder:
Why are we feeling anxious all the time?
Why do we feel unfulfilled?
Why do we worry about all and everything?
Why do we compare ourselves to others, whether we know them or not, and then feel unworthy?
Why do we feel the need to accumulate stuff?
Why do we feel unhappy and stressed, most of the time?
The answer to solve all of these issues, is LESS.
My* favorite topic. 🙂
Less makes us more aware of what is happening right here, right now.
Less input.
Less information.
Less consumption.
Less needing.
Less comparing.
Less….
The moment we focus on what is going on in our immediate surroundings, is the moment we make our world literally smaller.
The moment we focus on what is happening right now, is the moment we make our ‘time-world’ smaller.
The moment we stop worrying about what other people think, is the moment we make our mental world smaller.
The moment we unfriend strangers, is the moment we make our ‘need-to-be-seen-and-appreciated’ world smaller.
The moment we stop buying, is the moment we make our ‘unfulfilled, never-enough-world’ smaller.
The moment you start living right here, right now, is the moment you find peace of mind. Not looking back, not looking too far in the future. All that is real, is right here, right now. The rest is not happening yet, or is already in the past.
If we want to diminish our worries, our suffering, our stress, our anxiety, … we have to make our world smaller.
It’s not hiding from reality, no. We focus on what is going on in our real, nearby world, just not on what is going on in the entire world. We’re not meant to stress about all the worries of the world. Our fight/flight system is doing overtime!
Of course, we can still read the news from time to time in order to not become a complete hermit, but do not focus too much on it. Do not dwell on things you can’t do anything about. If you feel bad about poverty, about crime, about disaster going on somewhere in the world, you can do a small act here, where you live: help a person in need in your neighborhood. That way, you help make the world a better place, without needing to lose your mental rest about something far away, you can’t do anything about from where you live anyway.
Focusing on the present and on the near future, also helps to not go crazy in your head with all the ‘what if’s’, all the ‘maybe-scenario’s’. Nobody has a crystal ball to look into, nobody knows the exact outcome of events that are about to happen. No amount of worrying ever changed the outcome. If you really worry about something that is about to happen in the future, see what you can actually do today. Do this today, and then stop thinking about it.
The moment you stop worrying about others and their opinions, is the moment where you can release a lot of anxiety. Do not worry about what other people might think. First of all, you never know what they are actually thinking. Secondly, you can never please everyone. And so, the only way to go about things is, be a kind, respectful person who lives according to their own values and dreams. People who like you, will love you for being you. People who have different values, will never agree with you. Let them go, in love, and move on. No need for hatred or being resentful, just let them go, in peace.
Live and interact with actual friends, live your actual life. Stop pretending. Stop trying to fit in**. You know you either belong by being yourself, or you’ll never fit in, no matter how many adjustments you make to yourself in the hope you will be accepted by certain people.
The moment you realize you have more than enough, is the moment you’ll stop buying stuff. Look at what you have. Look at what you actually need. Hold on to stuff that makes you feel happy. Donate the rest. The less you have, the less you need to take care of.
Everything you own,
owns you***.
The less you have, the less time you need for cleaning, maintaining, insuring, storing, … and that means more time to enjoy yourself. Having less is not only cheaper, it’s also costing you way less energy. Hence, you have more time and energy to do fun stuff, to be happy.
The moment you start appreciating the present time, is the moment you can let go of worrying about past events, and of stressing about things to come. Of course, it’s normal we digest what has happened, and it’s normal we need to plan a little bit ahead. But you feel the difference between reflecting on the day or the week, and holding on to old pains. You feel the difference between making a grocery list and thinking about what you’ll cook in the next couple of days, and worrying about what you’ll wear next New Year’s Eve. I make it a bit ridiculous here, but you know what I mean. Do what you can right now, and then let it go.
Look around you, enjoy what is happening right now.
Otherwise, your life will slip by you, and you will have missed out on all the beauty of the present moments.
Make your world smaller and you’ll enjoy it more.
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Katrien
*’Less is Yes!’ by Katrien Degraeve.
**’Atlas of the Heart’ by Brenée Brown.
***’Becoming a Minimalist’ by Joshua Becker.