” We desire the opposite of what we once desired. Our prayers are at war with our prayers, our plans are at war with our plans” 

Seneca, Moral Letters 45.6

How so?

How are our plans at war with our plans?

Well, here is the thing:

What we really want, what we really desire,

and what we actually do to obtain this,

are more often than not, opposite to one another.

We would like to feel good,

but we complain the whole time that we are not feeling good.

We would like to change jobs,

but we never put in a real effort to find that job of our dreams.

We would like to lose weight,

but we feel we deserve this treat as a reward.

We would like to have a fit body,

but we never practice on a regular basis.

We would like to live in a clean, spacious house,

but we keep buying things so that our place is stuffed, and feels full and stuffy because there’s no room to clean, to breathe, to move around.

You get my drift.

Become aware of how you treat your ‘dreams’.

First of all, reflect on them,

Make sure you really know what is important to you,

What is worth the effort?

Know this first because you’ll have to make a real effort to achieve what you desire.

Once you know what you want,

Imagine yourself already living that dream.

Visualize, meditate on how this ‘new you’, your new “reality’ feels like.

Do it every day,

Become still,

And live your dream.

Hold on to that feeling.

Create in your mind this new you over and over again.

Plan how you are going to integrate this in your day-to-day life.

Make a step by step program of how you are going to get what you desire.

Stick to your program.

Do every day at least one thing that will bring you one step closer to your goal.

Never falter, never waver.

Remember the feeling you have during your visualization,

Remember why you want this,

Remember your dream.

There is only one way to get it: work towards it day by day.

If you are about to do something that is “at war” with your dreams,

something that will sabotage your progress,

stop, don’t do it.

As Martin Luther King Jr once said:

“Stop the civil war that is going on in your head.”

Don’t let one hand work against the other.

The Stoics say that this war is usually a result of our screwed-up judgements, our biased thoughts.

Work on that.

Manage your thoughts:

it’s the only way you’ll be able to change your behavior.

Become very clear about

what you think,

what you believe in,

what you want,

how you want to live,

who you want to be.Once this is crystal clear,

there won’t be any need to judge anymore,

there won’t be any biased thoughts anymore,

you’ll just live your dreams,

you’ll just mind your own business,

you’ll know what you want and how to achieve it.

Then you’ll feel

the inner peace,

the knowing,

the being-where-you-want-to-be,

the connectedness,

the coming-home-to-yourself.

The summer holidays are coming up, so my invitation to you this week is:

Become still,

Put your hand on your heart,

And listen to your inner self.

Stop the civil war inside you,

Find your place,

Find your peace.

Namaste

Katrien

www.lifecoachwomen.be