Lifecoachwomen.be

I heard the following quote of Dr. Wayne Dyer in a video the other day:

“Be a host to God or

be a hostage to your ego”

I always say love instead of God but that is just semantics, because God is Love.

It’s just what you prefer.

“Be a host to love or be a hostage to your ego”

Waw! Isn’t that beautiful:

To be a host to love,

To let love live inside you,

To be love,

To make your life, a life filled with love.

I recommend it -from the bottom of my heart- to you all, try it, give it a go, and then see what happens…

I know it is not easy, because we are so used to living

from the ego,

from old beliefs,

from a default mode which is not love.

If we look closely at how we react to life, it is safe to say that our ego’s rule the world….

We get upset because:

Somebody reacted in a way we did not appreciate… how dare they…???

Uhh, we do not control other people’s reactions so, why let it rule our peace of mind?

We get upset because:

We didn’t get what we expected…

Who is responsible for your expectations…?? Yes, the one and only: YOU.

We get upset because:

people don’t feel how we want them to feel…

Well, I don’t know about you but I can’t change somebody’s feelings… I can be nice to someone but I can never guarantee their reaction, that’s their responsibility.

We get upset by so many things that are out of our control and basically it is plain stupid to let that rule our peace of mind.

But here we are, living from our ego:

Our ego that “says” what we are entitled to, what is right and wrong, how people should behave, ….

All of our ‘beliefs’ that are put there by education, experiences, society, …

But are they true?

Do they make us happy?

No!!

We are upset all the time!!

Somebody “stole” my parking place

Somebody “stole” my job

Somebody was mean to me

Somebody is more beautiful than me, is richer than me, is healthier than me, …

And so on and so forth, the ego goes on and on, ….

We really are a hostage to our ego!!

STOP this ego driven life!!

Be a host to love!!!!!!!!!

It’s not easy because we are not used to it, we are programmed to react from the ego.

But try it, little step by little step.

Make every day the decision to live from love,

to be a host to love!

Let’s try the following things:

Every time you hear people talking ill of others,

disengage, walk away.

Every time you think ill of somebody,

change that thought into a loving thought (nobody is 100% “bad”, you can always -yes always- find something positive about them)

And that includes you too!

Every time you are thinking ill of yourself,

change it and send a positive thought through your mind.

Every time you start blaming, complaining,

stop yourself and think, what can I do about this to change it.

If it’s in your power, do it, otherwise stop complaining as you can’t do anything about it anyway.

Remove anger because anger is the absence of love (= quote of Dr Wayne Dyer)

Practice compassion!

The Dalai Lama says:

“If every 8 year old, all over the world, would meditate on compassion for 1 hour/week, we would eradicate all hate and acts of violence over one generation’s time.

I’d say: it’s worth the try, no?

Start practicing compassion! You never know somebody’s story, so be nice to people, to animals, to all.

Become humble, it’s really not about us, individuals.

As I said in last week’s blog: we are just a blip in the whole universe, we are all connected, there are no individuals, we are all part of the ONEness.

When love lives inside you, you feel grateful, you don’t need more because you appreciate what you have, you are content.

Being a host to love, is being generous, sharing.

We have more than enough.

I’ve already said it many times in previous blogs: take a good look around your house and you’ll see tons of stuff you can give away. Share!

You’ll feel so much better, lighter, brighter.

You will become a being of light!

And light makes darkness go away…

I know it is not easy in the beginning but:

baby steps,

it’s really all about making a decision and then go in that direction, every single day!

You’ll trip, you’ll fall into the ego trap again. For sure!

Everybody still does from time to time.

But remember your decision and stop yourself, think about being a host to love and go from there.

Nobody is perfect!

The more you practice, the less frequent you will fall down again!

And the shorter you will “stay down” in your ego reality.

You will recognize your behavior and as you made a decision to live from love, you will be able to quickly shift again to your higher self, to being a host to love again.

I believe in love being the ultimate goal of life!

I wish you all a wonderful, loving, heartwarming week!!

Let’s be all a HOST TO LOVE!!!

Namaste

Katrien

www.lifecoachwomen.be

We are human beings.

We all live here on planet earth.

We exist.

What does this mean?

Are we superior to animals? Plants? Oceans? Trees? …

Yes?

No?

Why do we often think we are?

Because we are supposed to be “thinking creatures”?

Because we know how to use machines?

Because we gather stuff, money?

Because ….

why?

And yes -luckily- we use our brains (sometimes not enough or not for the right purpose but that is another topic).

But where does that put us in the hierarchy of nature?

We spend a certain amount of time here on earth but our ‘life’, our physical body is just a blip in the universe, in time, in space.

When we see the complete picture, our time here on planet earth is just a hick-up in the whole universe.

Then why do we still feel so superior?

Why do we spend -during our little time here on earth- so much time gathering stuff, titles, money, …?

Seems a bit hilarious, no?

We pass for a universal split second on earth and all we do is look at our belly button and think everything is about us.

When we start seeing the planet as a place where everything and everyone is connected, we feel a shift in our consciousness, we start feeling more responsible for it.

We are all made of the same molecules,

almost every living creature needs oxygen, water, needs to feed itself.

Animals reproduce, build ‘houses’, have a family, …too.

There is a system in nature for everything: climate, seasons, currents, interaction between different creatures, …

And still, we believe: we, humans, have all the rights on everything on this planet….

Let’s just all think about nature, life, in its largest meaning, for a moment:

Everything here on earth, is here for a reason, has its own purpose.

Without bees, no pollination (so less fruit, less vegetables, less …anything that lives thanks to the pollination)

Without clean water, no life

Without trees, not enough oxygen

Without fields, no crops

Without animals, no balance in nature

Without the sun, no life possible

It’s not because we don’t see or know what the purpose of something is, that there isn’t any.

Actually, we could ask ourselves, what is our purpose, as humans, here?

There was life before us, the planet already existed, it’s not that it needed us, humans, to get created.

Actually, a lot of us do a great job trying to destroy it.

Luckily not all of us!

We are part of this extraordinary nature,

we need nature to be able to exist!

Plain and simple!

We are ALL interconnected.

So, I would like you all to be grateful for mother earth, grateful that we get to live here, on this beautiful globe!

Let’s all be conscious about what we do, how we live our life here.

Respect nature,

Protect nature,

Help nature restore itself by:

not polluting so much,

thinking before we buy, consume,

recycling what we do not use,

eating less meat

eating organic food

using water resources responsibly

not destroying habitats for animals

We are all one, let’s make this a planet where our children, grandchildren, …. can enjoy all the beauty nature has to offer us!

Start seeing “us” as one and you’ll feel yourself thinking differently!

You’ll start living differently.

You’ll feel less alone knowing that we are all here for a reason, that we all get to play our little, yet important, role in taking care of all living creatures, of everything there is on our planet.

I wish you all a very connected, ‘green’, ‘caring’ week!!

Thank you all for reading me!

Katrien

www.lifecoachwomen.be

New Year means wishing, and these are my wishes for YOU:

Love,

peace,

courage,

strength,

compassion,

a good health,

gratitude.

And I really do wish those things for you because I believe those are the main ingredients of happiness!

As the New Year has just begun, a lot of us made promises to ourselves, to others.

We are full of good intentions!

Research showed that halfway January most of those promises are already down the drain…

Why is that?

Did we not make that promise ourselves?

Were we not convinced that, this is what we really want?

Then why are we already slipping?

Ask yourself:

Did you make room in your life for this change?

What room? Why?

Think about it.

Did you create the possibility to actually start living that change?

If you want to get your body in shape?

Do you still lie on the couch every night? Watching TV for hours?

Or did you put an alert in your agenda to go running a couple of times a week, or whatever sport you prefer, and actually go, no excuses.

If you want to lose weight?

Are your cupboards still filled with junk? Why? Are you still planning on eating that stuff? Why? Don’t you want to lose weight?

If you want to get more sleep?

Are you still scrolling through your phone for hours every night?

Why? Do you actually think there will miraculously, be more hours before your alarm clock goes off tomorrow morning?

If you want that career change?

Are you applying for that job you are interested in? Or are you just waiting for someone to knock on your door and ask you to make a change?

If you want to be more relaxed, in peace?

Do you start meditating? Do you start yoga classes? Do you stop to breathe intentionally a couple of times a day?

Yes?

No?

I think you get my drift.

If you want to change something and I mean really change something: something else has to go.

Yes! Absolutely! No doubt about it!

And that’s scary! I know!

That’s why you have to want it bad enough. Because you will have to leave your comfort zone.

Letting go of old habits is hard, I know. But when they don’t serve you anymore, it is the only thing you can do if you want a different life.

Everybody has the exact same 24 hours every day and as you can’t create more hours in a day, you have to use those hours wisely and only in order to achieve your plan!

Make your plan, write it down in detail.

Create the possibility in your agenda to actually do the things you want to do, block it, protect it with your life!

Only then you’ll be able to make real change!

The main question is:

“How badly do you want what you want?”

If you really want something and I mean really want it, you will make it work, you will create space, create opportunities, block time slots in your agenda, put in the work to get there.

It is all up to you, and only you.

What are your wishes?

Do you REALLY want that change in your life?

If it’s a Hell Yeah! Then you’ll get there!

If it’s a maybe, if so and so… forget it!

Reflect on your wishes for a while, take a notebook and write them down.

Think about why you want them, what your life will look like once you’ve realized your dreams.

Once you’ve fallen in love with that new life, you’ll do everything to make that change!

Put in the work! And keep putting in the work until your new life is a fact!

You’ll be so proud of yourself!!!!Make 2020 the year YOU will get things DONE!

Wishing you all a very inspiring, goal oriented, persevering year where you are in the driver seat and where you WILL meet your goals!

I believe in you!!

Now, you have to believe in yourself too and put in the work!!!

Yes, you can!!!!

I would also like to thank you all for reading my blogs!

I really appreciate the interest you’re showing in my writing!

Thank you from the bottom of my heart!

Katrien

www.lifecoachwomen.be

Goals,

Intentions,

Expectations, …

As the old year nears its end

and the new one is just around the corner,

We tend to reflect upon our lives: we replay:

what we did,

what we still want to do,

what we regret,

what we are proud of, …

While wishing each other all the best for the New Year, people often ask:

“what would you like to happen this year?”

Think about this question for a while…

And I mean really think what this means for you.

What are YOUR goals, YOUR dreams, YOUR expectations for this new year?

When formulating what those are, take a very close look at them first:

Are they really YOUR dreams?

Are they really YOUR goals?

Or do you do,

what other people expect from you?

what society thinks is great, cool, wonderful?

Is it something you will be proud of or do you just want others to be proud of you?

If it’s not something you feel in your heart,

Well, okay, MAYBE you will please others but you won’t make yourself happy!

If you don’t live what you feel in your heart, you’ll never be happy, nor satisfied because you won’t FEEL it.

Therefore, search your heart for what it is that GIVES you energy and follow that dream!

The funny thing is, even when you are scared people won’t love you for it,

Once they see how happy it makes you, and how you radiate pure joy,

You’ll “contaminate” them with those great vibrations and guess what:

they’ll love you for it!!!!

So, stop being afraid to follow your path,

Stop pleasing others when it drains your energy!

Take a good and long look in the mirror and say:

“this is me, this is who I am and that is what I want to do”

Make sure your new year’s intentions are YOURS!

Make sure you’ll do what invigorates you!

Listen to your heart and start being YOU, really YOU!

That is what I wish you all for this new year!

Let’s meet your real goals, your real expectations.

Thank you all for reading me!

Namaste

Katrien

www.lifecoachwomen.be

The future,

When we think about the future, we automatically think about our children, don’t we?

Children,

Yes, THEY are the future.

But how can WE help to make a better future?

Where do we come in?

We can create a better future:

by being the example of

how we want our kids to be,

how we want the future to look like.

Yes, we have an impact,

Yes, we have a responsibility, absolutely!

We often hear:

yeah, but that does not really matter, that does not make any difference, that won’t hurt…

Well it does,

No matter what we do, big or small, everything has an impact on ourselves, on the people around us, on the world.,

We are all connected!

And as we are pure energy:

everything we do, sends a certain vibration into the world.

Everything!

So we better make sure those are good vibrations!

Be pure,

Be honest,

Be a good person,

Be compassionate,

Be loving.

You’ll notice that by being a true, kind person,

you’ll attract good vibrations,

you’ll feel better,

you’ll be a lot happier, healthier.

By being kind, you invite others to be kind too.

And yes, you’ll always meet the grumpy, bad tempered one too.

But by being kind to them, they’ll soften, they’ll lighten up (a bit).

And for the occasional one that stays bitter and angry,

be extra kind to them, know that they are suffering inside, that they are not happy.

I guarantee you that, by sending out positive, kind vibrations, your world will look a lot brighter and you’ll feel a lot lighter.

So, don’t wait!

It’s the perfect time of the year to start kindness!

Smile, wish everyone you meet a nice day and really mean it!

By setting your positive and warm intentions, you’ll see that every gathering, every moment, will feel different, will feel better, even if it’s with the same people you always meet.

Change your intention, change your vibration and feel the world around you, changing too!

Be that example for your children, for the world

and that’s the first step to a brighter future for everyone!Play your part in the big scene of life!

Let’s make it a great movie for everyone!

Thank you all for reading me!

I wish you all a very, very, warm, bright, loving Christmas

and a joyful New Year!

As John Lennon said: “Let’s make it a good one, without any fear!”

Katrien

www.lifecoachwomen.be

Compassion

Forgiveness

Understanding.

Those are the feelings that heal our body and soul.

Those are the only feelings that will make us feel better, happier.

Blaming,

Anger,

Revenge.

Only make us bitter.

The choice is yours:

Do you want to heal?

Do you want to feel happy again?

Do you want to smile again?

Or

Do you want to hate for the rest of your life?

Do you want to feel angry all the time?

Do you want to feel as a victim, blaming everyone else for your misfortune?

Every problem, every hurtful event, every challenge that comes on your path, is there for a reason.

We don’t always know what that reason is, and that makes it hard for us, humans, to understand that it makes us grow.

Sometimes it takes a long time before we are able to grow from it, to see the positive that is coming from that situation.

But even if we don’t know, don’t understand why we have to go through those hardships,

we do know that it gives us a choice:

will we become a better person because of it?

or will we become a bitter person?

Forgiving does not mean you condone what the other person did,

it means that you can let it go, so that you can have inner peace again.

Take charge of your own emotions, find you inner strength again!

You hold the key to your own happiness.

The moment you give that key to someone else, you give your power away, you become dependent on others, they get to decide when you can feel happy or not.

That makes you very vulnerable, very unstable, very powerless,

because you’ll never know how they will make you feel today.

Therefor,

It’s time to:

claim your power,

claim your feelings,

claim control of your life again.

How?

By forgiving!

By feeling compassion for those who hurt you. Only unhappy people lash out, once you can see that, it’s easier to feel compassion!

By understanding that everybody has their own story. Once you realize everybody has their own battles to fight, you can go a little easier on people.

By doing so,

you will feel lighter,

you will feel better.

You will feel more energy flowing again,

you will feel powerful again.

And life suddenly will seem a lot brighter, even if the situation has not changed!

No amount of hate, criticism, negative feelings,

has ever made anyone feeling better again,

has ever healed anyone!

On the contrary, those negative feelings make you sick. They diminish your energy so that you literally become ill after a while.

Only love, kindness, forgiveness heals, makes you healthy.

If you think forgiving is difficult, just consider the end result.

Which of the following results do you prefer?

Feeling sick, bitter, unhappy, powerless?

Or

Feeling healthy, happy, powerful?

That’s all for this week: compassion, forgiveness, understanding.

Some interesting thoughts to chew on in this time of year where people, all over the world, talk of peace and merriness.

Make it a truly happy and warm Christmas!

Thank you all for reading me!

Katrien

www.lifecoachwomen.be

Silence,

Peace,

Quiet.

“Silent night, Holy night”

We will sing it again in a couple of weeks:

But where do you find your silence?

Where do you go to, to be peaceful for a while?

It is so very important to have your safe haven, your sanctuary.

And even more so in busy days, in busy schedules.

We lose ourselves in this busyness and instead of saying ‘stop’,

we try to go even faster and further because we believe in this myth, that if we go fast enough, we’ll be able to do it all ….

What is “all”?

When is it enough?

When have we worked enough?

When have we cleaned enough?

When have we prepared enough food?

When have we invited enough people?

When have we enjoyed enough?

When have we practiced enough sports?

When is it enough?

Decide for yourself and say:

“This is my view on things and nobody will dictate me when it’s enough or not”

Besides, it’s quite absurd to even think that somebody else can know what feels as “enough” for you, isn’t it?

We all have our own view on things, we all have our own values.

Live your life and let others live theirs.

This is the best recipe for a peaceful and joyful world.Just breathe,

Just listen to the silence,

Make time, every day, to sit in silence for a while,

You decide for how long.

You can put your hand on your heart if you feel like it.

You’ll notice that the more stressed out you are, the more benefit you will get from it.

Take your time and you’ll feel so much better afterwards.

Once your mind and body calm down,

You’ll see more clearly the difference between:

what you want and

what others want.

Sometimes it is the same, but very often, it is not.

Know the difference,

Know when you are doing somebody else a favor.

Don’t forget to do yourself a favor too!

Because if you don’t take care of yourself, you’ll have no energy left to take care of others.

That’s the blind spot of people pleasers!!

Too much giving leads to burning out!!

Make sure your own flame is burning bright so that you can be the light for others.

Once your candle is out, you stop shining for others too.

And then we are all in the dark….

I would like you to schedule a daily moment in your agenda

to sit quietly,

to meditate,

to think,

to pray,

to …

whatever works for you

and write down what gives YOU energy.

Plan each day, each week:

At least one thing that will kindle your fire!!!

I wish you all

a “happy silence”,

a “happy you-time”!!

Enjoy and see how the world will benefit from you being joyous!

Katrien

www.lifecoachwomen.be

Expectations…

Those are the rogues,

Those are the ones, making us unhappy, frustrated, sad, disappointed…

Think about it:

When you are disappointed:

Were your expectations not met?

Probably so.

When you are frustrated:

Had you hoped for a different outcome?

I guess so.

When you are unhappy:

Were you expecting more, or something else?

I assume you did.

When you are sad:

Did you hope for something/ someone that is not there?

Very likely.

We always make a movie in our head about

how we think, about how we hope things will/should turn out.

But is this based on facts, on reality?

Or is it rather wishful thinking?

Most of the times we are not conscious about it but

we expect people to behave a certain way,

we expect people to say/do certain things,

we expect things to work out, in a way we think they should work out,

we expect the weather to be nice when we organize something,

we expect trains, planes, buses to be on time,

we expect not to get ill,

we expect …

we expect …

the list is endless!

All day long we have expectations and we get frustrated when things don’t turn out the way they do in the movie we have running in our head.

And that’s what is causing us stress, anxiety, unhappiness, frustration.

Susan Jeffers, Ph.D. specialized in personal growth and relationships, bestselling author, said in one of her books:

“If I could take one thing away from people on their journey to a happy life, it would be “expectations”!”

I couldn’t agree more!

Take away your expectations,

Adjust your expectations,

Communicate your expectations so that you are all on the same page!

I am not saying you have to be fatalistic, that is just another way of having (no, low, bad, unrealistic) expectations.

No, I would like you

to have an open mind,

to know that anything is possible,

not to cling to a certain outcome!

The weather may be nice or it may be bad.

The plane may be on time, the plane may be late.

Your colleague may be friendly or grumpy today.

Traffic may be fluid or completely stuck.

You may get promoted or not.

You may get a nice present or not.

…

If we are all doing the BEST we can, then we can let go of the outcome because that is all we and everyone else CAN do.

Your reaction to a situation determines how you will feel:

When the plane is delayed, no matter how frustrated you get about that, the plane will still be delayed.

When traffic is dense, honking your horn, and ‘pushing’ your way through traffic won’t change anything for the best, on the contrary.

When you are disappointed by someone,

first check if your expectations were not too high and

secondly, did the other person know what you expected of him/her?

For this week, try to see how your feelings relate to your expectations. Once you have a better view on that, you will handle situations differently and a LOT of negative feelings will be melting like marshmallows over a fire!

Check your expectations, adjust where necessary and enjoy the “letting go of the outcome”.

Just be!

Thank you all for reading me!

Katrien

www.lifecoachwomen.be

Living consciously,

Not blindly following trends,

Seeing the bigger picture.

I think it’s the perfect time of year to really step up to living consciously.

It’s time for presents, for celebrating, for abundance.

Let’s make this year abundant for someone who has little opportunities to celebrate.

What if this year,

we ask our children to donate, for every present they receive, something of their own stuff to somebody less fortunate.

What if this year,

we donate, for every festive meal we prepare, a meal to a food shelter.

What if this year,

we volunteer to help people, children, animals, … for one day (or more) as our ‘thank you’ for our own good life!

What if this year,

we actually mean it when we wish people a “happy” New Year, like really wishing good things, wishing love, wishing true friendship to people, wishing it with all your heart and soul.

By living more consciously, by living in the now,

you’ll notice that you will enjoy life more, that you will see more, hear more, feel more.

Instead of just following automatically the well-known paths we’ve already walked a thousand times, you will discover beauty in your life that you’ve never noticed before.

I am not saying you absolutely need to change paths, all I would like you to do, is to look around, to see where you’re going, to see what is going on around you and to be grateful for all you DO have in life.

We all have more than enough, we can all share more.

And you know, donating is actually a gift for the both of you:

they are happy because they get a present and you are happy because you made somebody else a happy person!

WIN– WIN!!

If you still have cold feet about donating, sharing, giving stuff away, …

Let me give you another very practical reason why you will love it!

By giving stuff away that you don’t use, that you have more than one of, or that you are just giving out of the goodness of your heart…., you create more space in your house!!

Creating space means:

less clutter, less stuff, less obstacles for the energy to move through!

The more space you have, the lighter you feel, the happier you feel!

Less stuff means:

less organizing, less cleaning, less maintenance!

So this really is an overall win situation!!!

Block an afternoon in your agenda so that you will have enough time to take a really good look around your house and to start collecting all the stuff that nobody uses anymore.

Believe me, if you haven’t used it for so long, you’ll never use it (again).

“one day” becomes “never”

Choose one (or more) shelters, organizations, …  and make boxes with the stuff you are going to donate!

Wrap a bow around them if you feel like it and then go and donate the boxes!!!!

I guarantee you will feel lighter, brighter, happier afterwards!

Believe me, it feels great!!

Wishing you all an adventurous “treasure hunt” through your house and remember, when you start doubting, know that you will be making people/ animals very happy!!!!

Thank you all for reading me!

Katrien

www.lifecoachwomen.be

I found this amazing Holiday Bucket List the other day!

It is the absolute perfect description of how I see the Holidays!

Really it is!!

If you think about all the stress that, nowadays, accompanies this “magical” time of the year, then what on earth are we getting ourselves in to???

People stress about:

what they should buy other people,

what they will get from their loved ones, ( jep … even that is stressful)

what they should prepare: will it be festive enough?

what they will wear,

who to ask,

who to put next to whom at the Christmas table,

etc, etc, …

Where has the magic gone?

Where is the true spirit of the Holidays?

Isn’t it about:

Love?

Taking care of others?

Making someone feel safe, warm,

Making people feel that they belong, …

That’s why I like this list so much!

The items on the list are what the real magic is all about!!

It is about:

Being there, really being there, listening, making time for someone.

Making your loved ones feel that you will always be there for them, that you will always have their back, no matter what.

Sending love into the world, by becoming quiet, meditating and sending your true wishes for love and peace into the world.

It’s about donating, food, clothes, toys, …to people who really need it, people less fortunate. We all have more than enough: make this year, someone’s Christmas, one they will always cherish.

It’s about being together, about bonding, …

Be the shining light, be the one who radiates love so that others can warm themselves in your light.

Too fluffy? Too woowoo?

Not necessarily!

Try it and you’ll be amazed of how wonderful you’ll feel once you’ve traded:

stressing about unimportant stuff

for

having a meaningful time, taking meaningful actions!

If you don’t want to go “cold turkey”( it is turkey time after all :-))

then at least do one of the above items of the list.

Once you’ve done such a wonderful thing, you’ll be hooked!

Next year you can do even 2 or 3 items on the list!

You’ll feel so much better, so much brighter, so much happier once you liberated yourself of all the ”have-to’s”

Think about it and try it!

I wish you a very inspirational “pre-Holiday” time so that you can really make this Christmas a truly magical time!!!!

Thank you all for reading me!

Katrien

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